Why The Myth of Control is Fueling Your Bingeing

Control is a tricky thing.

As humans we’re wired to attempt to control the outcome to things in order to produce results that we desire.

Makes sense, right?

One of the hardest things for us to accept, then, is when we cannot control something.

Bad weather during your pool party, someone breaking up with you, a loved one getting sick, tripping over your flat iron chord and breaking your toe (these are all just examples of things from my own life, but I have a feeling you can relate ;))

From big to small, we experience frustration around things we can’t control every single day.

One of the most detrimental areas of life that women especially attempt to control, is, you guessed it, weight.

From the time we are small, we are exposed to conversation around food and weight control almost everywhere we turn. And now with the presence of Instagram, it’s absolutely non stop.

The issue? We can’t control our weight.

Multiple studies show that 97-99% of people who go on diets for weight loss end up gaining back the weight or more within 3 years.

But that’s not the only issue with attempting weight loss. In fact, I would argue regaining weight is one of the least of our issues.

Attempting weight loss tends to take over our lives, whether you’re “succeeding” or failing for the time being.

Succeeding looks like paying a shit ton of attention to what you’re eating, your work outs, your weight, your physical appearance, and relying on those numbers and compliments for feelings of safety, joy, and confidence.

Failing looks like...well if you’re reading this I’m pretty sure you already know. 

Frustration, shame, anger, depression, apathy...all common experiences when the shoe eventually drops on your diet. 

Normally when we try something that produces such negative results, we stop doing it. However the myth of control leads us to come back for more, again and again.

If you accept that you can’t control your weight (which again, you can’t-long term), you actually stand a chance of being happy and relaxed around food. 

Why? Because you naturally become an Intuitive Eater. 

Intuitive Eater is really just another name for “normal eater”.

Someone who checks in with themselves, makes a decision about what to eat, and moves on with their lives.

Someone who is NOT an intuitive or normal eater, obsesses over their food choices, feels guilt, shame and anxiety with food, and continues to attempt to try and make “better decisions” next time.

The only difference between a normal eater and a disordered eater? A desire to control. 

This is a huge topic to cover, and one we do in depth in the Free From Bingeing program. 

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